This past week, I received a text message from my sister of a dump truck with it's bed in the 'up' position, like it was actively dumping it's load. I was wondering what purpose there was to sharing this with me, when I noticed there were power lines running across the windshield and a utility truck sitting in the road to the immediate right.
Apparently, the driver of this truck was unaware his bucket (?) was still up when he drove through the bustling metropolis of Vega, Texas, taking with him most of the power lines and the one red light. Yes, they just have the one. And it's not a real red light; it just flashes letting you know there is a Dairy Queen and a Subway nearby, I guess. I'm not sure why they even have it other than Vega is a town on Route 66, which was a big deal back in the day but hasn't really been relevant since the 1980s, somewhat like Steely Dan, Care Bears or Larry King.
Consequently, the power was knocked out to the entire town, and by that I mean, the 25 houses and two churches, of which one is inhabited by The Dad. Of course, I'm not talking about the church because he hasn't been to one of those since I bribed him with pancakes back in 2012 when he lived with me. It was Presbyterian. They weren't having a potluck lunch. He has not returned.
When my sister got to her house, she found The Dad sitting on the front porch, sweating like a field hand (because it's Texas and it's 138 degrees in the shade until sometime nearer Halloween) but smiling. Knowing he had missed his lunch because the restaurant that makes the meals for Meals on Wheels had lost power and hesitant to engage with a hungry Dad, she said, "Whatcha doin' on the porch?"
The Dad said, "Oh, some poor fella knocked out the power so I came outside. I can't read in the dark."
Still thinking he hadn't eaten she asked, "What did you eat for lunch?"
He said, "That's the best part. I got two lunches!"
She questioned, "What do you mean, two lunches?"
Looking at her like she was 'slow', he said, "Just what I said. The Sheriff came by with a lunch and then the Meals on Wheels lady came by with lunch. So I got two lunches today."
She said, "Did you ask why they brought you two lunches?"
He stared at her and said, "Why would I do that? If somebody hands you food, you take it. I don't care why they brought it."
She called her friend Jaylie and found out that when the power went out and the restaurant that makes the lunches for Meals on Wheels and the prisoners at the county jail couldn't cook, the Sheriff drove to the next town and bought BBQ for the prisoners. Because he knew the Meals on Wheels wouldn't have any food, he also bought food for their customers and delivered it. Of course, he knew who got Meals on Wheels and who didn't as there are about 24 people in Vega, y'all. For real.
Meanwhile, the restaurant found that it had enough provisions to make sandwiches, with fruit and chips and, not knowing that the Sheriff was delivering food, completed their normal delivery route. It was brought to their attention, not by The Dad, that the Sheriff had already brought meals, so The Dad got an extra lunch.
My sister, thinking that he still had some of the food, said, "Well, good. Since you have the extra lunch, I can eat that for supper and I won't have to cook."
The Dad said, "I don't have any extra food. What are you talking about?"
She said, "The extra lunch. I'll eat it for supper."
The Dad stared at her and said, "They brought me two lunches so I ate two lunches. It's what you do when somebody delivers lunch. You eat it at lunch."
She stared and said, "But they gave you two."
He said, "I know. I ate both of 'em. For lunch."
She laughed and said, "Well, you must be full."
He patted his belly and said, "Yep. It was a good lunch."
She sat down in the chair beside him and after a few minutes he turned to her and asked, "What's for supper?"
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